Harityas Wiyoga

Wedding Specifications

2007-01-19T08:38:00.000+07:00

Update as of 01/19/2007

Date:
Classified
Venue:
Masjid Asyirotussyafi'iyah, Pondok Pesantren Asyirotussyafi'i, Jakarta Selatan
Invitation:
1000 printed invitation
Website (on design stage)
Catering:
done but no clue whose the provider is (?)
Decoration:
on going settlement
Documentary:
Prewedding: done (sincere thanks to a friend of mine, the talented Mr. Brantas)
Wedding D-day: already picked one but not yet contacted :(
Dress:
Bride: custom made at Fadlan for covenant, possibly rent for reception
Groom: rent for covenant and reception

Merajut hidup

2006-10-31T17:04:00.000+07:00

Dulu gw pikir hidup mengalir seperti sungai, kita hanya tinggal go with the flow. Ternyata tidak. Kita perlu tahu cara berenang atau mungkin, idealnya, naik perahu. Arus hidup ngga selamanya "benar" apalagi sesuai dengan harapan kita. And I did my swim. Sometime in the near future, I will marry my girl friend. We've been together for 4-5 years (I think? Who's counting anyway?) Dan sekarang waktunya untuk beranjak menuju masa depan yang semoga cerah. Gw beserta keluarga sekitar November, bertepatan dengan ultah Indah, akan datang melamar secara formal ke keluarga Indah. Lamaran informal udah diajukan langsung ke sang Babe. Alhamdulillah, dengan bangga, gw melamar sendiri secara informal ke babenya. Dan melalui percakapan singkat, sang Babe setuju. Awalnya gw sedikit gugup tapi gw coba untuk tidak memikirkannya. Dan di hari-H, gw memang gugup tapi I've been worst.
Terkadang gw berpikir, wow sampe juga ya gw ke momen-momen seperti ini. Me, the 25 years-old looser, will get married! Hahaha...! Yah, gw sangat bersyukur bisa sampe titik ini pada usia yang pas. I don't wanna like my sis, the late comer. I also don't wanna be an early bird. I wanna be punctual.
Sekarang, it's time for the dirty talks. MONEY! Yes, in this system, money matters. With proud and worries, I am going with my own money. I don't know if it's enough or not. I have plan B, but not a very good one :D (that's why I called it plan B). But who cares, whatever comes in my way, I will face it. I always believe in the line of "In every hardship, there is a relief". I will my relief in my hardship.

10.09.2006

2006-10-09T11:15:00.000+07:00

The story for today is my birthday.
This late morning I turned on my cell and few smses arrived. The first one was from Ade a.k.a. Ade Tieka Lucu, congratulated me on behalf of ade and abang (both are my cousins: Tika n Emir). The second was from my sista on behalf on geka, bunda, n ayah. They are Kelapa Gading sub-family. And then Emir re-sms-ed my by his number, which is rarely being done, greeted (right v3?) me. And finally, Indah the lover happy bday me. The last sms so far was Ashary, a long-not-contacted friend.
I am grateful for those sms. I used to think birthday is merely a trivial issue to think about. But to tell you the truth, those congratulating smses has given me a soul boost. Knowing that others have a trivial yet quite important attention to you. The warmth of human relationship, if I may call it.
Beside being a birthday boy, I also need to renew my soon-will-be-expired ID. There are few shits here: first, I am yet to report to local resident authorities (RT n RW). Second, I don't have a ID size photo. Third, I will be dealing with bureaucratic rats to have my ID renewed.
What I really want for my bithday is an an MP5SD5 airsoft gun...:) The word is my bebe would make my wish come true. But, the thing I want most is I would like to have clear, smooth, hassle-free processes for my simple wedding. It's a main agenda in my prayers and I really really hope God would reply with positivity. Amin.

Static Duo

2006-05-24T11:15:00.000+07:00

Hey folks! You probably familiar with the Dynamic Duo a.k.a. Batman and Robin. Well, I have another version of a duo: STATIC DUO. Static duo is static, notorious, big-mouthed male chauvinists who worship spare time and free instant coffee. All they do is talk, talk, and talk. They won't walk their talk cause they could only TALK. The word Static in Static Duo literally means they are a static mortal. They love talking their words out and barely do anything.

Dicari: jaminan hidup bahagia

2006-04-19T09:37:00.000+07:00

Setiap realita-realita yang hadir di depan kita semakin menunjukkan gambar hidup secara keseluruhan. Dari hari ke hari, gue semakin sadar bahwa kehidupan ini benar-benar tidak memiliki jaminan. Jika kemarin kita merasa seperti raja, mungkin hari ini kita akan berakhir menjadi pesuruh. Jika kemarin suami/istri tercinta masih mendampingi kita makan malam, hari ini mungkin suami/istri tercinta akan sibuk berselingkuh atau terkena serangan jantung! Jika kemarin 10 SMS penuh cinta dari kekasih memenuhi inbox ponsel kita, mungkin hari ini kita hanya menerima satu SMS putus cinta. There really are no guarantee! Senyum lebar kemarin hari mungkin bisa menjadi remuk hati hari ini.
Tapi tetap saja manusia (kita) sibuk mencari dan menjaga indikator-indikator yang menjamin bahagia hari ini akan berlangsung hingga hari nanti. Hidup itu seperti bola salju besar yang bertengger di mulut jurang bukit bersalju. Menunggu satu dentuman kecil untuk melesatkannya ke dasar jurang, untuk hancur tanpa meninggalkan jejak.
Sebetulnya dan sebaiknya, kita lebih baik berhenti mencari jaminan dalam hidup. Maha Rencana hidup sudah ada jauh sebelum kita diciptakan. Yang terjadi kemarin, sekarang, atau esok sudah merupakan bagian dari Maha Rencana. Daripada sibuk dan pusing mencari jaminan dalam hidup, lebih baik menjalankannya dengan berusaha 110% melakukan yang terbaik untuk kita dan lingkungan sekitar kita. Dan jika saatnya untuk 'terjun bebas' tiba, jangan repot mencari parasut! Pasrah saja lah. Toh, kemungkinannya hanya dua: jatuh di atas kasur atau jatuh di atas bebatuan.

Kata Iyang.
Tulisan ini adalah bentuk terapi gue menyikapi fluktuasi kehidupan. Terkadang berhasil, terkadang memperburuk. Tapi lebih sering berhasilnya...:D

Indah, Indah, dan Indah. Semua tentang Indah...dan Iyang, tentunya

2006-04-12T09:42:00.000+07:00

Beberapa hari yang lalu, Indah bertanya sesuatu yang sangat mendasar ke gue. Pertanyaan: Kenapa Iyang sayang Indah? Gue selalu khawatir dengan pertanyaan-pertanyaan seperti itu, khawatir tidak mampu menjawab. Sangat sulit menjawab pertanyaan yang sifatnya mendasar. Sulit, seperti mendefinisikan kata adil, bahagia, sedih, dan lain-lain. Tapi pada saat itu gue menemukan cara menjawab pertanyaan Indah. Gue coba jujur, melihat ke dalam, dan menjawab berdasarkan apa yg gue lihat dan rasa. Gue menjawab: Karena Indah menempati kavling yang cukup luas di hati Iyang. Merasa tidak mendapat jawaban yang diinginkan, Indah kembali bertanya, mengharap jawaban yang lebih spesifik. Lalu Indah memberi contoh-contoh common answers which most men will reply. But hey, I no common! Gue tidak bisa memberi jawaban seperti itu, kalau Indah itu perhatian, baik, cantik...Itu kata-kata dan kalimat kosong yang miskin makna. Perhatian dan kebaikan akan datang dengan sendirinya dalam suatu hubungan heterogen. Untuk apa kita memiliki hubungan heterogen jika dalam hubungan itu perhatian dan kebaikan alpa? Dan untuk kata Cantik, sejelek apapun seorang laki-laki, pasti ia akan tetap mencari wanita cantik. Dan (maaf) kalau pun wanita itu tidak atau kurang cantik tetapi laki-laki itu mencintainya, laki-laki itu pasti akan dengan segenap hati yang tulus berkata wanitanya adalah wanita yang paling cantik! Jadi gue menolak menjawab selain jawaban yang sudah gue jawab. Rasa ini rasa yang rumit dan satu kesatuan. Tidak bisa disederhanakan dan dipilah menjadi satu persatu. Indah diam, mungkin berpikir sejenak mendengar kalimat-kalimat gue. Gue pikir Indah sudah paham.
Lalu gue balik mengajukan pertanyaan: Kenapa Indah sayang Iyang? Sangat berbeda dengan jawaban gue, Indah menjawab dua poin: apa adanya dan setia. Katanya, gue adalah cowok berkaus oblong pertama yang datang ke rumahnya untuk bertemu dengannya. Hahaha...ya...ya...gue inget! Kaos putih oblong, celana jins, dan sendal jepit sempat menjadi trademark gue pas kuliah. Dan berhubung dulu kantong gue masih seadanya, jadi mungkin gaya gue seadaanya (apa adanya :D) menjadi nilai yang gue tawarkan. Tapi gue paham maksud Indah. Gue berusaha untuk jadi Iyang apa adanya. Kalau sedang berduit, gue adalah Iyang yang berduit. Kalau sedang tidak berduit, gue adalah Iyang tidak yang berduit. Kalau senang dengar Andien, gue adalah Iyang yang senang dengar Andien. Kalau senang warna pink, gue adalah Iyang yang senang warna pink. Dan untuk kata setia, Kesetiaan memang nilai yang benar-benar gue pegang. Gue tidak peduli dengan apa yang pasangan gue lalukan. Selama gue percaya dan setia, maka semuanya (seharusnya) baik-baik saja. Gue juga pengen lihat kesetiaan ini membawa gue kemana. Ke palung penyesalan dan patah hati atau nirwana kenyamanan spiritual?
I am a scientist who empirically investigate myself to get to know me more. Cieee...

Oh iya...Indah is having a new hair do but she kinda hate it. She said she had done it to please me. Hehehe...sorry Babe! But still, I think you look stunning as always. Only this time, stunning with the bangs!

A long while

2006-02-23T08:12:00.000+07:00

Wow...it has been a long while since my last blog attempt. Busy? Yeah, you can say I'm a busy labor. So many things to be done and so many things left undone. What's new? Few. The first and VIP is I have a new cell phone. Yippee! Proud to say, I have a camera on my cell phone (finally). But the great thing is not the camera but its design. I'm a RAZR V3 owner now and she's so dead sexy! Take a peek on her.

What else yah? Oh yes I'm infatuated with a local movie called Realita, Cinta dan Rock n Roll. Great movie! Funny, sad, and yes honey, rock n roll to the grave! As a matter of fact, the book version of the movie (based on the movie script) is right at my own office desk. A little suggestion: watch the movie, do not read the book. The book is not mine, it's LC property. What the hell its doing in my desk while I have no intention to read it? It's to be cataloged. Oh yes, haven't you heard? I'm learning cataloging now (wow?). Such a librarian tale hah? Do I enjoy it? Well, let me put it this way...someday this cataloging experience will take me someplace new. I don't care what this will benefit me. All I know, I learn something. What better investment than knowledge?

So many things left unwritten. Not than I'm that busy, it's just I'm too lazy writing in office. I wish I had a laptop and a DSL access in my crib.

Mencinta dalam Kapitalisme

2006-01-11T12:14:00.000+07:00

Hal yang tidak menyenangkan hidup di sistem kapitalisme adalah semua itu ada harganya. Ya, harga! Harga yang dimaksud adalah harga yang secara materi terukur. Lebih jelas lagi, terukur oleh uang. Ya, lingkungan kapitalisme memang menyenangkan. Kita bisa memiliki kendaraan super mewah, sandang karya desainer ternama, hidangan segar dari bawah laut, dan bahkan empuknya cinta kasih dari lawan jenis. Kata memiliki menjadi semu arti karena kata memiliki berarti sesuatu dapat menjadi hak milik kita secara legal dengan syarat kita memiliki kemampuan ekonomi untuk memperoleh sesuatu tersebut. Sekilas tidak ada yang salah dengan definisi tersebut karena amatlah wajar bagi seorang individu memiliki kendaraan super mewah atau sandang karya desainer ternama atau menikamti hidangan segar dari bawah laut dengan menukarkannya dengan sejumlah uang (baca: kemampuan ekonomi). Namun definisi memiliki menjadi semu ketika dihubungkan dengan empuknya cinta kasih lawan jenis. Cinta kasih menjadi sempit karenanya hanya terdefinisikan sebagai suatu materi. Cinta kasih itu bukan materi! Cinta kasih itu nilai abstrak yang melengkapi manusia sejak manusia dilahirkan. Cinta kasih adalah perangkat lunak kreasi Pencipta yang secara materi tak berwujud dan (semestinya) tak dapat diwujudkan. Tapi lihat apa yang terjadi ketika sistem kapitalisme bersinggungan dengan nilai cinta kasih? Cinta kasih menjadi suatu materi yang dapat dibeli! Lalu apa istimewanya jika nilai abstrak nan agung dapat diperoleh dengan materi (uang)? Bukankah itu seperti memereteli keistimewaan makna cinta kasih? Bukankan itu seperti melakukan transaksi pertukaran uang dengan cinta kasih dengan Tuhan? Baiklah, untuk pertanyaan terakhir mungkin terlalu berlebihan. Tapi perhatikan dahulu analogi mudah berikut. Sang Pencipta melengkapi manusia dengan berbagai perangkat lunak (cinta kasih beserta teman-temannya). Semua perangkat lunak tersebut (termasuk cinta) diberikan gratis, tanpa embel-embel lisensi apa pun. Nah, ketika pemikiran kolektif manusia berhasil menemukan surga materi dalam label kapitalisme, cinta beserta teman-temannya terdistorsi oleh berbagai instrumen kapitalisme, yang salah satunya diwakili oleh uang. Pada akhirnya, distribusi cinta tidak lagi selaras seperti ketika cinta diberikan oleh Sang Pencipta kepada manusia melainkan distribusi cinta telah berbasis pada transaksi bernuansa ekonomi, seperti keadaan dimana seorang pria/wanita bersedia mencinta atas nama besar kemapanan ekonomi.
Bukankah itu hal yang tidak menyenangkan? Atau mungkin penulis hanya terlalu mengeksploitasi suatu hal nomal saja…?

Perhatian!
Jika Anda tidak merasa janggal dengan kalimat-kalimat tersebut, hampir dapat dipastikan nilai cinta kasih dalam diri Anda telah termaterikan :)

Laksmi Pamuntjak

2006-01-09T08:39:00.000+07:00

Di dunia yang ideal, dia adalah wanita yang ideal buat ku. Mengapa? Karena Laksmi Pamuntjak adalah seorang wanita kosmopolitan yang MAMPU menulis banyak hal. Beberapa karyanya diantaranya: Jakarta Good Food Guide, artikel-artikel majalah bernafaskan sosial, kultural dan politik, dan terakhir anologi puisi, Ellipsis. Walaupun belum pernah membaca tuntas karya-karyanya, kental terasa I'm in love with her, to be clear, her profile.

Semua bermula dari artikel Kompas tentang Laksmi Pamuntjak. Artikel tersebut didampingi oleh foto paras kosmopolitan Laksi Pamuntjak. Dan kemudian munculah sensasi itu! Wow...wanita ini...pujangga kosmpolitan! She dressed like a normal cosmopolitan woman, tight dark blue jeans with white halterneck top, and yet she wrote a book of poems. Wanita-wanita kosmopolitan yang ku kenal dan ku amati,maaf ,hanya mampu berdandan. Mereka hanya paham koleksi terbaru dari Dior, cara memadupadankan tas Louis Vuitton KW2 dengan jeans ketat, dan menggilai desain sepatu Manolo Blahnik. Bukan hal yang salah tapi semua terasa dangkal seperti kemasan plastik. Mungkin Laksmi Pamuntjak juga paham hal-hal seperti itu namun dia tidak lupa "mengisi" ruang otak dan hati anugerah Tuhan. Dan lebih hebatnya, isi ruang otak dan hatinya mampu diabadikan dan dibagi dengan sesamanya.
Di rimba tumpukan kemasan ini, aku merindukan sosok Laksmi Pamuntjak. Aku merindukan kemasan indah dengan paragraf-paragraf panjang dan rumit yang mampu membuaiku di dalamnya.

DISCLAIMER
Untuk menghindari misinterpretasi dalam tulisan ini, aku perlu menulis bahwa semua hal telah yang terjadi dalam hidupku sepenuhnya aku syukuri dan hargai. Tulisan ini hanya sekedar bentuk kerinduan yang perlu dibebaskan dari ruang-ruang di dalam tubuh ini.

Filosofi kerja keras versi Iyang

2005-12-23T11:03:00.000+07:00

Susah buat hidup di zaman sekarang. Semua orang pengen cepet kaya tapi ga mau berusaha keras. Mereka cuma mau kerja santai terima uang banyak. Gila aja! Orang kaya itu orang yang sudah melalui dan bahkan masih terus bekerja keras. Bedanya kerja keras setelah kaya, yang kerja lebih ke otaknya buat ngatur2 usahanya. Lagipula, definisi kaya ga melulu materi kok. Ada kaya amal, kaya akhlak, kaya teman, kaya monyet...hehehe!!! Lo mau ga kaya materi tapi hati lo gundah gulana karena, misalnya, keluarga lo berantakan? (Kasus stereotip bgt yah?) Lo pasti ga bakal merespon pertanyaan itu dengan ya atau tidak. Lo bakal berpikir orang kaya pasti seneng lah kalo seneng ngapain juga berantem ama keluarga? Gw juga mikir gitu sih tapiii...tau sendiri lah gimana sifatnya manusia. Beruntung kalo bisa kaya dan barokah. Tapi kalo kaya dan disirikin banyak orang termasuk keluarga lo? Sama juga bo'ong! Intinya...lo kerja keras semaksimal mungkin trus berdoa minta kaya, terus kalo da kaya jangan lupa bedoa juga, tapi subjek doanya diganti. Doa biar kayanya barokah!
Tuhan itu adil. Dia ga bakal ngebiarin pekerja2 keras selesai tanpa hasil. Walau terkadang gw juga bingung kenape orang yang kerjanya sepele bisa dapet rejeki sejibun sementar orang yg kerjanya mati2an dapetnya segitu-gitu aje. Tapi ga usah banyak bertanya kesitulah. Itu hak prerogatif Tuhan. Kita gugurkan saja ijtihad (baca: kerja keras) kita, hasilnya serahin ke Tuhan. Biarpun kita udah cukup lama bekerja keras dan hasil yg kita terima segitu-gitu aja, ya relain aja. Yang penting tetap kerja keras! Kalo kita da terbiasa kerja keras untuk mencapai sesuatu, lama2 kita akan terbiasa dengan proses kerja keras itu sendiri sampai kita ga tlalu memusingkan hasilnya.
Kalo pemikiran seperti itu da bisa kita terima, kita sudah belajar hal yang besar, yang otomatis kita sudah menjadi lebih baik dari sebelumnya. Kedengarannya idealis banget ya? Yah, you know me lah. Gw mencintai dan mengagumi semua hal yang bersifat idealis. Ga tau knapa...mungkin karena gw masih muda. Karena kalo gw da tua nanti,
idealisme akan terlalu mahal. Sekarang mumpung masih murah, gw puas2in aja sambil berharap idealisme gw tahan untuk seterusnya. Lho? Kok jadi ngomong idealisme yah? Ngelantur lagi deh...hehehe!
Gw pribadi berpikir orang kaya gw susah kayanya karena sok idealis. Liat aja orang sekarang nyari duit da kaya binatang. Main gontok2an segala. Etiketnya da pada luntur. Gw ga bisa bersaing ama mereka karena gw sulit untuk sikut2an ama orang. Bukannya gw takut, cuma bukan cara gw aja. Sebetulnya, gw emang takut siy, takut jadi seperti
mereka.
Jadi...selalu bekerja keraslah!

*Iyang sedang berusah menolong diri sendiri

Eits…nih posting belom selesai. Secara kebetulan (hmmm…gw ga percaya kebetulan karena semuanya udah direncanain ama Dia *SUDAHLAH, YANG!*) gw melintas beberapa artikel di Kompas tentang budaya unggul. Menurut artikel-artikel tersebut, salah satu komponen budaya unggul adalah kerja keras. Gw nemu beberapa kutipan pro kerja keras dan anti kerja keras yang amat sangat selaras dengan ideologi sikap otak (meminjam istilah Dhani Ahmad) gw.

Tentang manusia Indonesia dan kerja keras.
"Bangsa ini menganggap kerja itu mempunyai nilai rendah. Artinya, kerja itu beban, kerja itu suatu keterpaksaan, kerja itu suatu siksaan. Manusia Indonesia pada umumnya bermimpi hidup senang, hidup enak tanpa kerja. Lalu siapa yg mnghasilkan makanan dan sebagainya? Seperti pada zaman Yunani kuno, ya orang-orang rendah, rakyat jelata itu. Merekalah yg disuruh kerja, menghasilkan padi, misalnya."

Untuk manusia Indonesia yang tidak senang kerja keras.
"Nilai paling tinggi itu hidup senang. Hidup senang artinya punya banyak uang. Bagaimana menciptakan harta banyak tanpa kerja, ya korupsi itu..." [dan untuk para wanita Indonesia yang enggan bekerja keras, mereka menikah dengan pria/lelaki/cowok/duda/pria yang berpoligami dengan harta materi yang melimpah demi nama besar ketenangan materi dan ketenangan hati (?)] *yang di dalam kurung siku, murni kutipan sinis dari gue…hehehe!*

"Dalam gambaran besar, bangsa ini dijuluki bangsa yg berperilaku tidak menghargai proses, tidak suka kerja keras, tetapi ingin serba instan."

Bangsa yg merendahkan etos kerja
Kompas, 10 Desember 2005

*Iyang telah sedikit tertolong olah orang yang menulis artikel di Kompas

*sedikit otokritik, Iyang juga salah satu manusia Indonesia yang terkadang kalah oleh kemalasan dalam pertarungan kerja keras, contohnya? Lihat aja tulisan panjang yang disusun saat (semestinya) bekerja di kantor.

Guilty pleasures

2005-11-09T15:12:00.000+07:00

600000 Rups for a jean!
This is not a very good idea to spend 600000 Rups of money. But, it happened! It’s not really my money though. I got this 600 grand Levi’s from my bebe as a birthday gift. At first, I was not agreeing AT ALL. 600 grand for a jean? It’s really a pricey joke. But she insisted me. She said it’s okay to have at least one pricey jean in life. I replied with a plan to buy two pairs of Levi’s with 700 grand as a total price. The plan failed, as always. I ended up with only a pair, a pair of 600 grand jean (!). This is definitely the priciest jean I’ve ever had. But all is worth of money. The jean fits perfectly. I’m very happy though someone’s wallet was robbed. ? Thanks beb! So, what do you want for your birthday, beb? Let me guess…another Anya Hindmarch bag? Hahaha…
Browse around Kaskus BB17 forum in the middle of the night
What can I say? I have been a big boy for some years and big boys like babes, especially when they’re naked. ? For those of you who curious what the hell is BB17 forum, allow me to explain before you see it for yourself. It is a forum which contains picture of naked female, to be definite, local naked female. BB17 stands for buka-bukaan 17 tahun or in English, bare naked for 17 years of age. Get the picture?
Watch infotainment
Infotainment is every where! It’s on every channel of TV. Sometimes it’s grotesque, like you have no better things to do. Sometimes it’s fun, especially when you have no better things to do. I often curse the show and often enjoying it. It’s a great show to see beautiful people with less brain usage…hahahaha!

Sekarang Lebaran!

2005-11-03T09:15:00.000+07:00

Sedih, Ramadhan telah melintas.
Bahagia, Hari Kemenangan tiba.
Tapi apakah kita telah menang?
Atau seperti tahun-tahun yang telah telah lalu, kita hanya menang dalam menahan lapar dan melepas hura.
Obral pahala telah usai. Harga pahala kembali normal, mungkin akan menjadi mahal.
Mahal karena waktu yang sempit. Mahal karena iman yang tipis.
Coba kau perkirakan pahalamu. Apa sudah mampu memberati kanan mu?
Pahala ku belum. Oleh itu aku mengharap pada Ramadhan depan dan selanjutnya.

Taqqoballahu minna wa minkum.
Maaf lahir dan batin.

Aku orang spiritual yang sesat dengan keimanannya.

2005-11-02T12:07:00.000+07:00

Spiritualisme itu memabukan.
Aku rindu rasa mabuk itu.
Walau belum pernah bertemu, aku yakin akan lezatnya rasa mabuk itu bagi hati.

Keimanan itu menyesatkanku.
Menyesatkanku dengan ajaran-ajaran yang belum mampu aku lakukan.
Sesat keimanan menyadarkanku bahwa tempatku nanti bukanlah tempat yang indah.

I'm dumb, you're dumb, and so is everyone...so what's the big deal?

2005-11-02T12:04:00.000+07:00

I see smart people doing dumb things. I see dumb people doing even more dumb things. I see my self doing, sometimes, smart things which frequently hated by dumb people. And also, I see my self frequently doing dumb things which clearly hated by dumb people. Everyone is dumb then. No such thing as smart people because most of them who maximize their brain prefer to insist their rights before their obligation. Most of them include me? No! I do my thing first and ask for my rights, then.
College degree won't make you smarter. It'll only make you legitimate to be called smart ass...without it, you'll be dumb ass...well I haven't got my degree yet, so it makes me a dumb ass hah? Not really yah...a real dead dumb ass a.k.a. dumb people is those who ask too much and give little. At least, that's my version of DUMB ASS.

Manusia Amat Sangat Bodoh

2005-11-02T09:34:00.000+07:00

Imam Al Ghozali berkumpul dengan murid-muridnya. Lalu Imam Al Ghozali bertanya kepada mereka......
Apa yang paling berat di dunia ini?". Ada yang menjawab "besi dan gajah". Semua jawaban adalah benar, kata Imam Ghozali, tapi yang paling berat adalah "MEMEGANG AMANAH" (Al Ahzab 72). Tumbuh-tumbuhan, binatang, gunung, dan malaikat semua tidak mampu ketika Allah SWT meminta mereka untuk menjadi kalifah (pemimpin) di dunia ini. Tetapi manusia dengan sombongnya menyanggupi permintaan Allah SWT, sehingga banyak dari manusia masuk ke neraka karena ia tidak dapat memegang amanahnya.

Manusia…manusia…kok bodoh amat sih! Gw selalu bertanya siapa sih yang mewakili kaum Manusia yang menjawab permintaan Allah SWT? Atau memang karakter Manusia yang memang sudah terlanjung sombong bin bodoh sehingga dengan mudah menyanggupi menjadi khalifah di dunia? Atau mungkin jika gw yang menjadi wakil dari manusia dalam menjawab permintaan Allah akan tetap menyanggupi permintaan tersebut? Karena esensi Manusia yang penuh kesombongan dan keserakahan? Bayangkan saja, Malaikat…ya Malaikat! Mereka tidak mampu menyanggupi permintaan itu.
Kita, Manusia, tidak akan ada di bumi jika kita tidak menyanggupi permintaan itu. Manusia mungkin tidak ubahnya akan berada pada posisi yang sama dengan Malaikat, melakukan semua kehendak Allah SWT dan selalu berzikir kepada-Nya. Kita, Manusia, tidak perlu khawatir dicemplungkan ke dalam Neraka dan tidak perlu berseri-seri memikirkan Surga.
Sekarang, gambaran awal kehidupan semakin jelas. Allah SWT menyerahkan dunia kepada Manusia bukan tanpa alasan. Manusia telah memilih. Ya, ME MI LIH! Dulu, gw selalu berpikir kehidupan datang tanpa pilihan. Bahwa dunia diserahkan kepada Manusia tanpa Manusia memiliki hak untuk memilih. Pilihan itu jelas ada. Tumbuh-tumbuhan, binatang, gunung, dan malaikat memanfaatkan pilihan itu dengan bijak.
Sekarang, hanya ada rasa maha khawatir bagi mereka yang sadar dan tawa-tawa liar bagi mereka yang mabuk. Tetap sadarlah atau tetap mabuklah, toh pilihan sudah tidak bisa diubah. Selamat menikmati janji manis Surga! Dan selamat menikmati gundah ancaman Neraka!

Am I dyslexic?

2005-10-21T15:49:00.000+07:00

Dyslexia according to Cambridge Advanced Learner's Dictionary:
a difficulty with reading and writing [typing] caused by the brain's inability to see the difference between some letter shapes

Dyslexia according to Dyslexia institute
Dyslexia causes difficulties in learning to read, write [type] and spell. Short-term memory, mathematics, concentration, personal organisation may also be affected.
Dyslexia usually arises from a weakness in the processing of language-based information. Biological in origin, it tends to run in families, but environmental factors also contribute.
Dyslexia can occur at any level of intellectual ability. It is not the result of poor motivation, emotional disturbance, sensory impairment or lack of opportunities, but it may occur alongside any of these.

Most dyslexic students have been identified to have one or more of the following deficiencies in the sub-skills that are required to acquire and use adequate literacy skills:
1. A marked inefficiency in the working or short-term memory system. This means that a dyslexic student may have problems with the amount of information that can be held and processed in the real-time, conscious memory.
2. Inadequate phonological processing abilities causing problems with connecting the letter patterns with the associated sounds. This is usually due to problems with the speed in which auditory information can be processed and with accessing the memory of audio sounds to relate them to the letter pattern.
3. Difficulties with automaticity (?). This can cause problems with getting things in the right order or sequencing and may also show itself as clumsiness caused by the brain sending the wrong signals to parts of the body in the wrong order.
4. A range of problems connected with visual processing to do with the speed in which visual information can be processed and with accessing the memory of visual patterns.

Dyslexia can be summarised as having problems with processing visual or auditory information; with holding that information in working memory and with kinaesthetic awareness, co-ordination and automaticity. These can affect academic progress across a variety of subjects. Specifically:
Reading, writing [typing], spelling, expressing thoughts, sequencing, differentiating left from right, orientation, short term memory, time management, organisation

The bolds are my problems. So, are those problems make me a dyslexic? Or a semi dyslexic? You tell me...

Ignorance is total bliss!

2005-10-18T12:38:00.000+07:00

Many times, we receive something we need not to know. And as spice of stereotype paradox in life, we don't always get what we want to know. The first one could be disastrous as sometimes people don't like people who know something they shouldn't know. What we know, whether we are aware of its existence or not, could provoke good and bad value for us. Let’s talk about the bad (cause there's no point of analyzing good stuff!). Let say, if you're happen to be a KGB agent who knows something really bad about your country (which is Uni Soviet) what would you then? Talk loud to the public about it and wait for the government poisons you, sell the information to CIA, ask for their protection, and start nuclear war or keeping it as secret and bury it very deep while a special government team hunting you down? It doesn't sound like an option hah? Either way, you'd be screwed in the end. Another more earthly scenario, you receive a paragraph in a quiet and sleepy morning which tells other people business and ask you to solve the mystery with risks on your shoulder. Would you kiss and tell? Or hide under your blanket, pretending nothing ever told? I don’t kiss and tell, nor hide under my blanket. I ignore things as if it wasn’t my consumption. I act as if it is a spam, spamming my small and stuffy life.
Personally, I choose not to know too many things. My personal experience proves if you know too much then you're smart, but (there's always but in life)...if you're smart but not lucky enough, you're dead. I take one as an example. In my religion, which is Islam, you have to know the knowledge of your devout. Questions like these will need to be answered: where do you receive the knowledge, from which you receive the knowledge, are the knowledge transfer process by standard, and are the knowledge valid (shaheh)? If your answers are not the same as it is told in Koran and Hadits then they're all useless and, sometimes, will lead you to a wrong path, which is very much likely, hell. Or if you have all the needed standards and knowledge in you pocket, you would know that there's always something you know which will fail all your effort as we, human, are not perfect and tend to be far from perfect. Personally speaking, in Islam, there are more advantages in being dumb then smart. Dumb, in term of knowing little knowledge, is more excusable then smart, in term of knowing much knowledge, but do little of their knowledge. I am the second category person, who knows quite much knowledge but often merely crying for my fate. Ignorance is a total bliss!
God has regulated all things that we'll encounter in our life. And God is well-understood of our ability in coping with problems. When the bad happens to you, then it should be happened. If you have to go to Hell, it would be your place then. If you belong in Heaven, pleeease take me with you...

Hello world!

2005-10-10T18:12:00.000+07:00

Hey World! Hello again! It's been a while since my last post. A major change is happened, in term of accessing internet. Now, I have a less time privileged of screwing internet in my office. I guess it is a good thing though, considering my inefficient behavior in accessing internet while at work. I am now a much more industrious person (read: employee)! I have to spend some rups to browse and screw around in internet. Yes, the connection that I have is quite pricey and slow.
Anyway, lots of things happened. The bad and the good. I prefer to talk the good. The good is the Ramadhan. I am very grateful to be able to experience another Ramadhan. I am waiting a revolution in my life. And I hope this Ramadhan could bring such. What kind of Revolution? I have three among million wishes to be listed in my so-called revolutionary phase. First, to be able to get married sometime next year. To meet this goal I need to get a loan or good fortune (?) (I am having difficulties in finding meaning of Rejeki in English). Married is not merely about feeling. It is also much about financial, to be exact economy. I have a great salary, considering my age right now. But I also have bad habit of spending cash in no time. Lucky me hah? I need a revolution to change the way I act with my money, to be able to save up some money for my wedding. I do not want to fully pay my wedding with bank loan.
Second, I really want to finish my school so that everybody's happy. A college degree would be a good investment for my career. Though I see and meet a lot of stupid people with degrees...hahaha! Last but not least, I need to equip my self with more knowledge. What I have in mind is to become a web designer. I can be a freelance and make more money (again, money word! Don't you hate it?) Why I have to include this in my wish list? Because I need a push, a real goddamn push! I have had this idea since last year but I make no action yet.
Another good thing is my birthday was yesterday. No party whatsoever, but I got a luscious birthday cake from my bebe, Indah. She, as always, surprised me by coming to my house with a birthday cake. I really can't ask for more. Without being snob, I don't need no gift (except from my bebe, hahaha!) because I am in a condition where I could buy all things that I want. Birthday is a time to think what have you done so far, where are you right now, and where will you be then. Unfortunately my answers to those questions are so so. I have done virtually nothing, I am an employee with blessed income, and my future is still blurred. The answers are quite summed up my life.

Near, hear, and disappear

2005-08-24T11:26:00.000+07:00

I see her face, polished by sunlight. Bright.
I watch her face in a distance. Grace.
I love her in a slight light, in a split second, in a stare, so.
I bare in this soil ground just to feel her stand. Grand.
I am near and here. But disappear.

Tahu?

2005-08-24T11:25:00.000+07:00

Ada orang yang tidak tahu dan tidak mencoba mencari tahu
Ada orang yang sok tahu dan mencoba mempengaruhi orang yang tidak tahu dan puas dengan kesoktahuannya
Ada orang yang cukup tahu tapi kurang menunjukkan kepada orang yang tidak tahu dan orang yang sok tahu kalau ia cukup tahu.
Siapa yg bodoh? Nomor 1, 2, /3? Anda tahu?

VE 4025

2005-08-24T11:19:00.000+07:00

I am a big fan of tortoise eyeglasses. The classic aura of tortoise motive is so me. Everytime I see a glasses, be it sunglass or RX, I always look for the tortoise version. But now I don't know why I choose this VE4025. This Versace 4025 is no special. I prefer Police rectangle greenish tortoise, which unfortunately did not go well with my head size. The tortoise Prada is also nice, but then again my head is the problem. I had Oakley in mind, but none of it stole my attention. So, I end up with this 4025. It's bloody freakin' Versace!!! So what gitu loh...?

Design improvement

2005-08-11T12:55:00.000+07:00

As visually feel, this blog has been refurbished. I am thinking to move my blog to a non-free web hosting. I am bored with this common style. Anyway, the current design is a modification of blogger's template. The brown liquid in the glass is ice tea. I am a big fan of ice tea! Ice tea with lots of cubes...hmmm...! So, I will call this new design concept as White Ice Tea.

ecolo[mo]gy

2005-08-08T08:01:00.000+07:00

Lomo show off!!! It's time to show things off!

Case closed

2005-07-29T13:54:00.000+07:00

I put my ego aside and opened communication with my babe. And she replied with a fist-fight line. This morning she killed her ego. I we learn something. And yes, we are too STRONG for this kind of fight.
Happy to say, the confrontation is over. Case closed. Everybody wins. :)

4 days

2005-07-27T14:52:00.000+07:00

It is been four days I have not communicated with my babe. I have called a truce thru SMS, but no reply yet. She was on my house yesterday, picked up her books. She had a short conversation with my mom and gave Geiska a treat. It shows things are still okay but we still have no communication.
This whole thing feels so wrong...but ego of mine is still too big to be beaten. It is not a matter of right and wrong. It is how a relationship could survive this kind of situation. We should survive this test, considering we have succeeded on previous bigger bumps.

I very much feel something is wrong.

Let the fight begin

2005-07-25T13:48:00.000+07:00

Sometimes it is hard to understand people--people who have been around for quite some time. The more you know them, the more clueless you are. There are always things that surprise you. It is easy if you could patiently cope with it. But patience is a very rare and limited sense. You get emotionally react to those new situations. What happens next is confrontation. Their ego and your ego collide to burst up a high-tempered communication. When it is happened, one of you needs to calm down. My version of calm down, in this case, would be leaving the confrontation.
I had a confrontation with my babe, arguing abstract and non sense issue. As always, I walked out the fight. I am not interested in monolog discussion. I would stay arguing when it is a two way communication.
I suspect her hormonal fluctuation has caused this confrontation. She was on her PMS. She frequently behaves in irritating manner during her PMS. Normally, I have enough patience to counter this kind of situation. But, sadly, my patience was not backing me up at the time. I have no regrets over this, though.
I am expecting two-way conversation (read: confrontation) with my babe whenever she has something bugging her mind.
I am not a mind reader and I do not want to guess. I want her to tell what's bugging her mind and have it converse with me to solve her mind-bugging problem. Very simple.

JCA's farewell party

2005-07-22T15:32:00.000+07:00

Our kind Library of Congress Jakarta (LCJKT) Field Director, Mr. James C. Armstrong (JCA), will be leaving Jakarta soon. JCA retires from Library of Congress after his 30 something years of devotion. The party was filled with lots of food, laughter, and prizes! Yes, prizes! He gave his 40 items to all LCJKT staffs. Among the items are TV, printer, and DVD player. My luck came short. I didn't get any of those three items. I only got a DVD. But no big deal, though. I had a fun, but also sad for his leaving. I had no complains over him. JCA is quiet person. I never see him complaining nor yelling.
The future will be challenging situation for me and all LCJKT staffs. It is certain the next chief would be not the same as JCA. But life goes on. I have prepared for the worst and good. Whatever it takes, it is not human's call. It is God's call.

Good bye JCA! God speed!

Respect

2005-07-22T09:57:00.000+07:00

I might be a too-old-fashioned person but i consider respect in any types of relationship as a must. A respect does not have to come in an overwhelming manner. It should come simple and plain. I do not need people to salute me. It doesn't have to come that way. I appreciate respect that comes in listening what people have to say in a conversation, to not cut in their line. I put less respect to people who talk with others while I am on the phone with him/her. It annoys me badly.
I expect respect from and put respect to people surrounding me, especially my inner circle: family, close friends, colleagues, and girlfriend. Most of the urban set respect aside due to their economic thinking. They merely care for all things economy. They see result, instead of process. They abandon idealism and reach everything they can, improperly. Repulsive!
I am very much aware this idealism of mine will not get me rich fast or ever (?). Because all the rich and famous are those who commercialize their idealism. I am none of them and very pleased about it.

Stupid e-mail

2005-07-20T16:17:00.000+07:00

A weird e-mail hopped in to my inbox, yesterday. The e-mail was too scandalous for a Tuesday's morning routinity. The e-mail taled a scandalous affair (yes, I am exagerating!) about person no.1 and person no.2, which, both, happened to be friend of mine. I was shocked while and after reading the e-mail. The sender also asked my favour to do something about it. I replied the e-mail and rained the sender with questions of my confusion. I also told him/her that the e-mail had caused disturbances to me. Of all the person in the world, why s/he choosed me to tale the affair and asked my favour?
The sender answered my reply. Instead, giving me answers, s/he apologized for his/her rude behaviour. But s/he still warns me to do some observation about the affair, to prove s/he is not wrong.
Frankly, I don't give a damn about the affair. I just reserve when someone I do not know send me something in lack of manner. They should give their background before try to open communication with me. Then, the communication process could be proceed.
I have all the problems in the world. I do not need one more problem. Period!

I love shreding!

2005-07-15T10:37:00.000+07:00

The last few weeks have forced me to be more industrious employee. The weeks to come will cost me more energy to settle things up. This is what one of those employee's high times. High times in working monotonous tasks. I have approximately 15 boxes (could be more!) of duplicate magazines and newspapers and all of it must be disposed in proper manner. It sounds easy--dump things up. But it isn't! Trust me, because disposed in proper manner means it must be disposed without maintaing its original format. Meaning? The disposed items will not be in its original form. It should be in other form, in my case, it must be shreded before disposed. And we're talking shreding 15 boxes of paper-based magazines and newspapers! It could take days to dump the whole 15 boxes. O...my...God...
Yes, I am complaining! But I am always greatful to God for everything I have and that includes the experience of shreding
15 boxes of paper-based magazines and newspapers... :)

Red and yellow sky

2005-07-12T12:51:00.000+07:00

I had a dream last night. It was horrible. The sky was burnt and turned red and yellow. It felt like sky crashed and ready to hit the earth. I woke up with my heart beat at its top pace. I am glad it was just a dream. It was 0230a. I should've gone Tahajud but I didn't. I was too lazy. It is said in Koran and Hadits, one of the reason we have hard time to wake at the last one third part of night is because devils urinate on our ears. I merely managed to spell Astaghfirullah couple times before I fell asleep.
I think the judgment day will be pretty much like that. It feels like a warning for me to notice, to not conduct any wrong doing no more. This life is too scary if you know too much. We, human, are always under the gun-point of Hell and flirt of Heaven. And many of us will end up gunned down in Hell...

Surviving Lampung

2005-07-11T14:56:00.000+07:00

Destination Lampung: day 1.
The trip began at Gambir station as we, all Hutauruk and Hutauruk descendants shared the same bus together. The ride and the journey were OK. It's just we need eight exhausting hours to get there. And, the worse part is the strait crossing. The ferry type supposed to be a RORO car ferry, but I prefer to call it a floating rusty ton-weight iron ferry. Yes, it has air-con class but it's pretty much trashy. Don't talk about hygiene coz it is virtually forgotten. Trash and unwanted smell all over. And the scattered passengers were annoyingly sat wherever they like. They sit on the hall way, the balcony, anywhere! There were sits provided, but as always Indonesian has their own mind, the irritating one. And, I strongly think, safety is their least concern.
I managed to get a few shots using my Lomo. I took some pictures of the ferry's mast, chimneys, and sea views. I can not wait to see the result. I hope there'll be good and clean shots.
Finally, eight hours gone. We arrived at Bandar Lampung and went straight to my relative's house. At dinner, they served us typical South Sumatra food. One that has gotten my attention is Tempoyak. Wikipedia explains (!) Tempoyak as:

...basically made from the fruit called durian. The flesh of the fruit is kept in an airtight container and some salt is sprinkled over it before the container is closed. It will take a few weeks for the durian to turns sourish. This sourish state of the durian is called Tempoyak.

The Tempoyak I ate was accompanied by Baung fish. I have no idea what kind of fish is this. The food tasted a little bit sour. I had no problem with its taste. What bothered me was the smell. The smell of durian. I like durian to be consumed as a sweet fruit with delightful and powerful odour. But when you eat with fish and rice as dinner, it is REPULSIVE! I only made it to eat three spoon of it and gave up. The local found the food luscious. The stronger the odour, the bigger appetite the have.

Destination Lampung: day 2.
On the second day, it was very much proven that Bataknese are famous for their voice and singing frenzy. Everybody sang! Everybody except Tebet family, which includes me and my family. But we were asked and FORCED to sing a song. And we did terriblelly. Me? I did the old-fashioned way, lips sing. The song was Mother How are You Today, specially devoted to my beloved grandma, who turned 82 at that day. My sister led the pack with her karaoke-style voice. It is a good thing that her hobby got useful. All the bataknese artist wannabe sang their voice out until they can't sing no more. I was lucky not being there to watch all of them sing because I had to leave to my sister's father-in-law house.

Destination Lampung: day 3.
I was so happy and anxious to go to Jakarta. The Hutauruk pack has packed their things off. As we waited for time, an incident happened. Two extended cousins of mine, which I barely know their name, accidentally said to one of their mom about me. They asked why I am so quite. The mom apparently is the big-mouthed type. She called up my mom and asked my mom to match making me with my two extended cousins. One of those two cousins of mine is my Pariban. Pariban is a bataknese term for a cousin who can be wed legally. If you are a male, your Pariban would be daughter of your mother's brother. If you are a female, your Pariban would be son of your father's sister. Quite confusing hah? Pariban is bataknese way of maintaining their economic wealth to their direct descendants. Then, I was dragged to them, asked to introduce my self! The whole room was laughing out loud. But I kept my head on. I did not crack under the pressure. Buy, I enjoyed it though and still laughing it. :)
It is good to be back to this loved yet hated hometown, Jakarta. The eight-hour trip feels like paid off. The trip was quite a joy. I had fun with my long-time-no-see cousins. They were so loud, especially Ompung Alex grand children. When they were all together, the room decibel was raising. But they're all okay. The word is the next gathering would be in Jakarta at my uncle's house. Can't wait? Yeah right...gimme a break! :)

PS: Thank you to a friend of mine, mba Decy Sihombing, who has brought me a more clearer meaning of Pariban. :)

Destination: Lampung

2005-07-07T16:07:00.000+07:00

Yes, folks! I'll be gone to Lampung for this weekend. I will be off tomorrow and make my way there. There'll be two rolls spent for lomo. I hope I'll get some nice shots of Lampung. I've never been there and also this is not one of those awaited journey. It will be a journey of remembering my one of my roots. That's all...

Mind affair

2005-07-07T12:50:00.000+07:00

I have an affair. In my mind. An imagination affair. Is this forbidden? It is not a love affair. Worse, it is mind affair. This is not right. I should not cheat. I should commit to be loyal to my mind. What I have I done? How could I be so low? I am guilty as charged. I apologize. Truly sorry. Will you forgive me, Mind?

Blog Monitoring

2005-07-06T15:17:00.000+07:00

Jakarta Digital Content Team. This name surprises me. What a name hah? And I am proud to say, YES, I am with the team. ;) The team of few people who crawl URLs in search of specified blog content. Apparently, preliminary results have stolen more attention. Things get more serious now. People are being listed to make more official team. I really thought this blog searching is a one-eyed project. Well, it ain't. I have no clue what they do about our searching results but one sure thing efforts are paid off.
Library of Congress (LC) has good greediness of information, if I may say. LC will not let any information goes by without being acquired and thus, documented. This good deed looks simple but involves a lot of complicated efforts. No pain, no gain, right?

Interviewing myself

2005-07-05T12:37:00.000+07:00

FIRSTS
First best friend: some kid at TK Komp HI Kelapa Gading (I forgot his name).
First car: dont have it yet.
First screen name: meaning...?
First self purchased CD: original CD,Madonna. pirated CD, Coldplay.
First pets: ikan cupang.
First piercing/tattoo: dont have one.

LASTS
Last cigarette: I don't smoke.
Last car ride: this morning, fake patas 08 P. Gadung - Blok M PP.
Last good cry: few weeks ago after praying for my lost mini iPod.
Last library book checked out: few years ago.
Last kiss: last saturday, a kiss on the cheeks and forehead.
Last crush: three years ago?
Last phone call: 15 minutes ago.
Last time showered: this morning.
Last shoes worn: now, Puma, the super sneaker.
Last song played: Padi, Tak Hanya Diam.
Last item bought: fake Adidas black rubber wrist band.
Last annoyance: the stagnant world of office job.
Last shirt worn: my sista's SMUN 68 sports wear.
Last website visited: someone's blog
Last word/s you said: Terima kasih, Pak!
Last song you sang: Padi, Tak Hanya Diam.
What color of underwear are you wearing? grey, the FO's version of NEXT.
What’s under your bed?: dust.
What time did you wake up today?: 0450a, re-sleep and wake up again at 0550a.

FUTURE
Where do you want to go? : New York.
What is your career going to be? : Librarian cum web designer.
Where are you going to live? : some place where the grass still green and high.
How many kids do you want? one? or two. : two.
What kind of car(s): hydrogen-powered 4WD car.

CURRENT
Current mood: so so.
Current music: no music.
Current taste: flat.
Current hair: 2cm style, cutted with number 3.
Current clothes: purple polo shirt.
Current annoyance(s): empty wallet, empty saving.
Current book: no books, just lots of vietnamese magazines.
Current hate: peniless.

(x) - you’ve done
(_) - you haven’t done

(_) been drunk
(_) been high
(x) kissed a member of the opposite sex
(_) kissed a member of the same sex
(_) crashed a friend’s car
(_) been to Japan
(x) ridden in a taxi
(x) been dumped
(_) been in a fist fight
(_) snuck out of my parent’s house
(x) ever dated someone of the opposite sex
(_) ever dated someone of the same sex
(x) had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
(_) been arrested
(_) made out with a stranger
(x) stole something from my job
(_) celebrated new years in time square
(_) gone on a blind date
(x) had a crush on a teacher
(_) celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
(_) been to Europe
(_) skipped school
(_) cut myself on purpose
(_) been married
(_) gotten divorced
(_) had children
(x) seen someone die
(_) been to Africa
(_) Punched a friend when playing around
(_) Been to Canada
(_) Been to Mexico
(x) Been on a plane
(_) Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
(_) Thrown up in a bar
(_) Purposely set a part of myself on fire
(x) Eaten Sushi
(_) Been Snowboarding
(_) Met someone in person from the internet
(_) Been moshing at a concert
(_) had real feelings for someone you knew only online
(_) been in an abusive relationship.
(_) been pregnant or got someone pregnant
(_) lost a child
(x) gone to college
(_) taken painkillers
(x) love someone or miss someone right now

UNIQUE
1. Nervous Habits? asked by Boss to do something quick.
2. Are you double jointed? nope.
3. Can you roll your tongue? yes.
4. Can you raise one eyebrow at a time? yes.
5. Can you blow spit bubble? yes, and lovin' it!
6. Can you cross your eyes? nope.
7. Tattoos? nope.
8. Piercings and where? nope.
9. Do you make your bed daily? nope.

CLOTHES
10. Which shoe goes on first? right.
11. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone? nope.
12. On the average, how much money do you carry in your wallet? around 50000 rups.
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7? 24/7? I have no jewelry! :(
14. Favorite piece of clothing? white tees.

FOOD
15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it? Twirl.
16. Have you ever eaten Spam? What the hell is that?
17. Favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate mint.
18. Favorite candy treat? not quite a candy fan.
19. Ideal bagel? have tasted bagel once, and don't like it.
20. How many cereals in your cabinet? none.

Ungu Violet

2005-06-27T16:09:00.000+07:00

Damn, Dian Sastro has never let me down. She pushed my button again! The movie chemistry was so real. The covered romance was such a bliss. Rizky Hanggono, the new guy, the accidental star, can balance Dian Sastro's acting. Not the best that I have ever seen, though. But it's a ok for a new comer. The chemistry was lively attacking the sitting audience to their very heart, at least that was happened to me. I can't tell whether the acting or the actor that made the chemistry. All I know I was strucked by it and still feeling it. For this reason, I say it was a good movie and worth seeing
The story is bad news. It is so stereotype. A dying young photographer, Lando, loses love of an undying normal woman,
Rara, because of his illness.Then, as you commonly could guess, He falls to desperate hole. Until one day a coincidence
greets. He finds this hidden jewel from a common suburban girl, Kalin , and simply irresists Kalin's charm. Lando uplifts Kalin to the top scene world of glamourous model. But then Lando dumps Kalin before their love got any further due to Lando has learn his lesson with Rara. And then the story runs. The now-reknowned model, Kalin, gets to meet Lando for the very first time after their long pause. Lando feels he owes Kalin an explanation. An explanation explained. When things just starting to go well then the holywood cliche comes. Kalin walks under a car while she chases Lando. Cliches continue until the finally-happy couple ends this happy story.
What I do not like is the story very much exploits illness. Lando has leukemia and Kalin, after the accident, loses her sight. And way out of Kalin's illness is being simplified. Kalin gets a cornea donor from one of her fans. It's like the writer races out with the movie duration and win the race by simplifying end of the story.
I got confused relating the title with the story. After reading the movie synopsis, it turns out ungu violet is an ongoing process of ungu (purple, stand for romance,sweetness,dream, and mystery) in search of balance to become violet. Ungu itself is a mixture of merah (red) which represents expectations and biru (blue), which stands for emotion.
Here' a paragraph from director statement about the title:

Ungu Violet adalah sebuah identitas yang tercipta dalam perjalanan yang sangat panjang. Untuk mencipta dan kemudian lahir melalui sebuah emosi dan ekspektasi yang terwakili dalam rasa biru dan merah yang kemudian bersatu menjadi ungu. Ungu yang mewakili rasa romantis, manis, mimpi, dan misterius. Ungu yang bergerak ke titik keindahan dalam keseimbangannya menjadi violet.

(english) Purple Violet is an identity which comes from a very long process. To create and and then come to its existence trough an emotion and an expectation, which symbolise in Blue and Red, which then unite to become purple. Purplerepresents romance, sweetness, dream, mystery. Purple who searches its balance and beauty to become violet.

The Avocado-Sweet Worries

2005-06-21T13:02:00.000+07:00

The sweet bitter of a thick tea.
Slight of worries in mind and enlighted heart.
Tell me things I should worry for...for all those worries is useless.
Though, one worry is real. The worry of abandoning the One.

Faces that toxicate your senses. Don't believe them. Think clear, breathe well.
For God would send you the bad with the covered good beneath.
Have faith. Have it.

It would be a story in life. It would be a lesson to learn and an experience to tale.
Have no worries. Let those paranoias be gone. Think well, breathe clear.
Live it, with no worries.

Library of Congress goes CSS

2005-06-09T15:40:00.000+07:00

Two words: neat and nice! Library of Congress (LC) website is now available on CSS. Unfortunately, the refurbishment does not touch all of its web pages. LC online catalog page is still stuffed with tables. I know it takes time to fully shift to CSS layout for website as big as loc.gov. But I very appreciate the deed. CSS is a must. It's a standard. All website in internet should be based on CSS. CSS gives a powerful page download and only cost relatively small amount of file size. I believe someday CSS will be a factual standard in web page layout. It's only a matter of time.
The code is neat too and bulletproof. I haven't tried it on IE but who cares about IE. it's only a lame browser :P I learn something from the layout also: absolute positioning. It gives me a vivid look of the another application of CSS absolute positioning. Such a fun stuff... :)

Vicious circle.

2005-06-09T11:27:00.000+07:00

How could you escape from the vicious circle when the vicious one is you?
It's like devil complain the curse to be lived in hell, while the curse is caused by them.
Is he nuts? This whole thing is caused by accumulated problems with him as the only primary source of problems.
Why is it so damn difficult to realize, that sometimes, or many times, we make shits. The normal human, commonly, would soon realize the shits and try to shit out the shits. Does he need all entire planet creatures to make him sober?
I have seen several kind of this type--the shit maker type. I think this is one of the reason the world could
not be an ideal place for all of us to live. One percent of this type in total population of earth resident is very enough to make hell on earth. Imagine, 1% of approximately 6 billion--that is a six with nine zeros--of it breathe the same air with the rest of the normals. To be clear, 60.000.000 shitmakers living in the population. No wonder this world is heavily sick.

*Please apologize for brief language written.

Three days Two nights

2005-06-07T11:24:00.000+07:00

I never like going to Bandung when it comes to 'school thing'. But unfortunately, I had to go there and I did. So there I was spending some bucks to get me start doing my research. The two main mision was: finding 'kamar kos' and going to library to obtain some inspiration. I did find rooms available for rent. But the problem is it must be rent for one year period and paid in advance. I plan to work my research less than one year (by God permission). So, mission number one: failed! I got no room. But then, I was told to go JKT-BDG back and forth. That's what most of my friends do. It's cheaper...I guess. Mission number two: not so bad. I got some inspiration for my research. I got the common topic and the less common topic. The common topic is monograph acquisition in my beloved workplace, Library of Congress Jakarta (such a hyperbolic :P). I just need to describe the acquisition mechanism and do some evaluation. The less common is about Really Simple Syndication (RSS) technology. RSS is hi-tech form of selective dissemination of information a.k.a table of contents service. RSS is no different than the traditional table of contents service in library world. It helps its user to see headlines/articles titles of a website before users open the website. I'm interested in describing how RSS made, works, and used. The problem is I still can't imagine from where I would get RSS users feedback. A scientific research must be specified and limited. RSS is internet technology which is widely used. Thus, I must set place limitation if I want to examine this subject.
This is a problem.

Dublin Core confusion

2005-05-19T12:35:00.000+07:00

After reading some reference about Dublin Core, I got confused by it.
Facts:
I know that it is metadata standard for electronic resources commonly found in the internet.
I know it can be presented in HTML/RDF/XML.
I have applied Dublin Core elements to my blog.
Questions:
What I still have no clue about it is what is it for...?
Is it only act as some kind of Cataloging in Publication (CIP) for electronic resources?
Or is it beyond that...? Does it have any effect with search engine?

I'm trying to engage a feasibility study here, for my final project.
I've been dealing and thus learning quite close with metadata (in form of MARC) for the last two years. And it is such a pathetic fact for me to not understand the use of Dublin Core. If it has some relevance with search engine, I would bring the subject for my research. It would be an interesting subject! :P
I have e-mailed Mas Hendro about the uses of DC. I hope I will get satisfying responses real soon. *finger crossed*
Somebody get me a god-damn metadata specialist!

Wise word

2005-05-13T15:43:00.000+07:00

NOBODY DIES VIRGIN
COZ IN THE END, LIFE F**CKS US ALL.

Lost.

2005-05-10T12:29:00.000+07:00

God sends me a little warning, just when I try to clean this very heart of mine.
It's such an irony.
He took this little piece of me.
I know I am too least in front of him.
I know I have made mistakes, the big one and the small one. But...

I cry at heart.
Crying for this world.
Crying for the less important.

Theoritically, patience is all it takes.
Could I survive this lost?
God tests me to know, whether I am a survivor or I am nothing.

It's just a thing. A thing with price.
I still have many priceless thing to be taken care of.
But, still, it's so hard to letting it go...

SexPod Unleashed!

2005-05-09T16:21:00.000+07:00

After hiding the SexPod for two weeks, finally, I unleashed it for public. It is not a big deal, though. It's just I don't like showing new stuffs to people. Sometimes, people like to showing off their new somethings. But It's just not me. On the contrary, I prefer to hide it for sometime before it naturally revealed.
In Islam, there's a term for people who likes to show off. The behaviour is called Riya. I'm not totally free from this Riya, but I try to avoid whenever chances for this Riya opened. I'm aware there are times we need to showcase (not show off!) what we have but we have to do it in full manner. You don't want to look like those villagers (read: orang kampung) who left their manner away, right?
Anyway, I joked my sis telling her that I own a mini iPod. She just laughed at it. But yesterday I revealed...I do
have a mini iPod. :))

Geiska birthday bash

2005-05-09T16:19:00.000+07:00

Geiska is two years old now! He's no longer a baby boy but a toddler. To be complete, a destructive toddler. No party for Geiska, just some small family gathering (which can not be categorized as a b'day party since no b'day cake involved). I bought Geiska a cool shoe, sized 28! Before buying the shoe, I asked the counter girl what size will fit for a two-year old. She recommended me size 24, a common size for a two-year. I was shock, Geiska last shoe was 26, and it was starting to shrink. This kid is really over his age, in terms of size.
Anyway, the size 28 is meant for four-year old toddler. But it's ok coz the shoe will last for quite some time.

Happy b'day Geiska! XOXO.

LIVESTRONG

2005-05-06T15:33:00.000+07:00

Setelah beberapa waktu mencari gelang karet yg sering dipake banyak orang, akhirnya ketemu juga. Iseng-iseng nyari pas lagi nunggu bis di Blok M, eh ketemu. Gw baru tau kalo setiap warna gelang punya arti yg berbeda. Gelang kuning yang ada tulisan LIVESTRONG itu maxudnya menunjukan kepedulian kepada penderita kanker dan riset kanker. Kalo yang merah SOLIDARITAS KEBERSAMAAN, itu untuk menunjukan kepedulian terhadap pendidikan anak-anak Indonesia. Dan masih banyak warna-warna lainnya yang punya arti tersendiri.
Ternyata gelang model gini dipopulerin ama Lance Armstrong, juara Tour de France 6 kali dan juga seorang penderita kanker. Kampanyenya dia sukses besar. Jutaan orang di dunia make gelang LIVESTRONG-nya. Trus merembet deh trend-nya. Muncul warna gelang yg beraneka ragam dengan pesan yang bervariasi. A very simple action which leads to a very enourmous movement.

Gw pribadi pake gelang ini karena...keren dan every body's wearing it, so why can't I? :)

Weekend and Movies.

2005-05-02T16:12:00.000+07:00

I spent two movies for the weekend. First, Janji Joni. A muchly hilarious Indonesian movie. The movie kept me laugh out loud for approximately 90 minutes! It was so 25000 rups worth it! All the movie's elements are mingling very well. No character went to stage alone. The whole characters performed hilariously well. The movie gave me no time to pause from my laughing. The acting is natural. The story flows smooth. The script is imaginative. Even, the extras are top notch! Joko Anwar (the director) has made an excellent debut.
Janji Joni tells a very simple story: the adventure of a movie roll courier named Joni. The simplicity develops to complexity when Joni has to overcome several unique incidents in his way to catch the schedule of movie screening between movie theaters. This is where the best parts come and funny things happen. I won't tell ya the details coz y'all have to see it for yourself *accent on* :)
Joni is played by Nicholas Saputra, a talented early-age actor. Three words about this guy: smart, simple, and quiet. He is such an inspiring character for me. I don't wanna be like him (play silver screen etc.) but his character inspires me to cater my self in action, not words.

The other movie is Boogie Nights. I have watched this movie before and luckily found the pirated DVD. Boogie Nights is about an anonymous teenager from a small town who become adult movie actor and got succeed. It also depicts story behind the scene of adult movie industry and the greedy people who steer the industry. You get a visualization of Jullian Moore act as a veteran porn star and Mark Whalberg as a whiz kid of the industry. The story ends in tragedy. Nobody's happy. Tears and blood flooded.
The movie is good because the background of the story (adult movie industry) which is rarely documented. I'm always curious about what goes behind the scene in the porn movie. How do they make the scene, how the actors and actresses feel, and how do they end up.

Bossa.

2005-04-21T11:05:00.000+07:00

Bossa is the music you frequently hear on bookstores like Aksara and QB. It has chill vibrant that gently
pampers your ear and your mood. I don't know for sure, but I think it comes from Brazil. My first realized bossa was
Japan-born singer, Lisa Ono. I heard it in my cousin's car. It felt like erasing time from the present. Like timeless
condition. You just hear soft sound and see no problem. Fine music it is.
Yesterday, I just bought two pirated CDs and one pirated DVD. One of it is Bossa Classiques. It sounds great and
relaxing. A very perfect music to be put in my SexPod. Now, I'm still trying to find Lisa Ono's pirated cd. Do you
know where I can find it?

Welcome, iPod Mini!

2005-04-12T08:42:00.000+07:00

I am now, officially, no more just an iPod fans and wannabe. Yes, I am an Ipod mini owner! My first Apple product ever! Here are some documented pictures.

Shoulda, woulda, coulda...

2005-03-23T10:43:00.000+07:00

I just found out that rock groups such as Smashing Pumpkins, Oasis, Cardigans and much more are listed in LC online catalog! LC has some of their entire album. Very interesting fact. LC does acquire more pop-culture-oriented materials. I would be great to work for LC to acquire those materials.

No where

2005-03-22T09:11:00.000+07:00

I feel like I am not in a place of mine. I feel so reluctant to this
condition. I wish I could find another space to nest.

A Curse in the Morning

2005-03-17T10:08:00.000+07:00

Being comfortable in the morning is to be seated in crowded public transportation, where your right side is a pushing, complaining, and standing crowd. While your left side is a blurry window pane with a view of traffic jam. And all you have in mind is what the fuck is goin on! Is this reality for real? Having pay for 3500 rups for this utterly grotesque transportation service is one of numerous reality bites of living in Jakarta.
I am not complaining! I am cursing! Cursing those who do not act properly, those who become too greedy to make
their living, those who care more for money than people, those who demand their rights before their obligation.
I am cursing those sick human being! By God, I hope I am not one of them.

Life is suicide.

2005-03-16T15:17:00.000+07:00

Have you ever thought about this? About doing it? I, whatsoever, have no plan for suicide but had some thoughts going
on in my head, that projected my self in such situation. Vividly, suicide is a sin. It can not be done with any excuse. But there times when the goin gets tough and the tough gets ungoin. The pressures one can get sometimes become too massive to one can handle. And then, suicide comes as a choice. A bad choice.
Suicide is painful and pointless. It is not a way out. It is merely an ephemeral way to a new kind of big troubles. It is a very wrong thing to do. However, I am not confront with those who had doing it or choose to doing it. I completely understand the anatomy of life's problem. So and too complex. When suicide comes as a choice in one's life, the decision of doing is exclusively belong to ourself and God.
Life itself is a suicide. You are alive, you are committing suicide. But you are not dead yet, still living in endless pain. The question will be which one is worse--not which one is better? Doing it or not doing it? Never-ending pain or maybe-not-a-never-ending pain? Some choice hah?
What a life! What a fate! What a mistake!

Bad feedback

2005-03-04T16:10:00.000+07:00

I got a undirect feedback about me and my babe. It irritates me a lot so I feel it is needed to blog this "event". The feedback which written in a subtle manner says I fit not with my babe! Hello! Who fits who?! Nobody fits no one! Even Eve did not fit with Adam! And one thing for sure, she is very unfit with me! Yakxxx!

Hey you! Yeah you ugly girl! I'm makin' millions here, and you? Still begging to your mama and dada? Get yourself a word of INDEPENDENT! I N D E P E N D E N T! You should try that, to know whether you are alive or merely dependently alive.

Life's Project

2005-03-03T14:55:00.000+07:00

I'm, currently, coding for my completely CSS-based personal website. Much at a time, it tickles me that i can't completely get my hand in CSS. But at a high time, I rule the CSS! :) This kind of mystery rejoices me. And, I just feel this ecstasy of coding, to get something the way I want but have to conquer some codes. Fun and yet irritating.
Screenshot will soon be made available.

Thanks to these inspiring folks for their open-source spirit:
CSS vault, BlueRobot, HTMLdog, and other unmentioned gurus.

Out of the box.

2005-02-25T11:09:00.000+07:00

Pola pikir di luar kotak. Atau ke luar dari kotak?
Inilah pola pikir yang sudah cukup lama diterapkan Iyang. Ditambah sudut pandang pesimistis dan pertimbangan-pertimbangan resiko yang super ketat, maka jadilah seorang Iyang.
Tapi jangan salah! Pola pikir ini hanya berlaku untuk isu-isu pra-kehidupan, kehidupan, dan pasca-kehidupan.
Untuk hal lainnya? Pola pikir "konvensional" Iyang masih diterapkan.
Iyang berharap untuk menemukan (tidak melulu wanita! seorang pria pun tidak masalah) seseorang yang berpola pikir serupa. Iyang ingin membandingkan dua pola pikir yang serupa tapi tidak sama, agar bisa melihat kekurangan dan kelebihan pola pikir out of the box. Pernah beberapa kali ditemukan seorang dengan pola pikir yang berbeda. Namun, pola pikir orang tersebut lebih pada pola pikir progresif futuris. Sering kali ditemukan seseorang dengan pola pikir "aneh". Ada aneh yang sekedar aneh dan ada pula aneh yang membingungkan dan merugikan banyak pihak. Ya, benar! Banyak pihak.
And here I am, stone-freezed in the crossroads searching for the Out of the Box. Are you the One?

Meet my new friend, her name is CSS!

2005-02-25T09:07:00.000+07:00

Believe it or not, CSS is getting more friendlier to me. I am beginning to understand her language. Don't buy it?
Check this costumized blog page. A kinky yet naive simplicity presented by my new friend, CSS. :P

Merasa Nyaman?

2005-02-25T07:57:00.000+07:00

Rasa nyaman adalah di saat kita tidak hidup dan tidak mati. Menjadi tidak ada, tidak diciptakan adalah rasa nyaman yang sebenarnya. Tanpa iming-iming surga dan tanpa todongan neraka. Hanya menjadi tidak ada. Salahkan berpikir seperti ini?
*A Spark of mind in 08.

C'mmon Iyang! It's Friday! Be a more TGIF person (read: labor)! Hahaha...

Ongoing project: personal website.

2005-02-24T11:12:00.000+07:00

I am currently getting my hands dirty in coding. Two page has finished: mainpage and disclamer. Hahaha! Why disclaimer first? I have no idea. It just pops up all of a sudden. Now, I'm moving on to gallery page. So little pics I have and sadly,
none of them are very good. *wish I had a DSLR* Ok then, back to coding. Adios amigo!

Speaking of...

2005-02-23T07:49:00.000+07:00

Emansipasi. Terlalu sering didefinisikan dalam kerangka yang salah. Wanita tidak akan pernah setara dengan pria. Wanita adalah bagian dari pria. Wanita adalah tulang rusuk pria. Pria berdiri sendiri pada puncaknya, begitu juga wanita. Bagaimana bisa setara jika berpijak pada tempat yang berbeda? Emansipasi adalah dimana wanita dapat melakukan semua (red: tidak sepenuhnya) hal yang dapat pria lakukan. Tetapi bukan untuk menjadi setara. Masing-masing memiliki kodrat. Pada bentuk sosial yang paling sederhana (keluarga), wanita akan kembali pada pijakan awalnya (baca: kodrat) yaitu melengkapi, menemani, membantu pria.

Feminisme, seperti didefinisikan pada Cambridge Dictionary online:
the belief that women should be allowed the same rights, power and opportunities as men and be treated in the same way,
or the set of activities intended to achieve this state

.
Wanita patut mendapatkan hak (rights) yang sama dengan pria. Wanita patut mendapatkan kedudukan (power) yang sama dengan pria. Wanita patut mendapatkan kesempatan (opportunities) yang sama dengan pria. Wanita patut mendapatkan perlakuan (treat) yang sama dengan pria. Tapi, wanita bukanlah pria (dengan maksud positif). Dengan segala kekurangan dan kelebihannya, wanita tidak dimaksudkan untuk setara dengan pria. Karena puncak yang berbeda tetapi untuk tujuan yang sama.

iPod shuffles!

2005-02-03T08:12:00.000+07:00

iPod Shuffle 512MB. USD 99. IDR ??? Insya 4JJ, akhir Maret dah dikantong...hehehe!

Good deed

2005-01-24T11:52:00.000+07:00

A good deed and a forgetful mind is not a good combination.

And what d’you know...? A mere good deed is far from enough...

A lesson learned.

My Betta Boys

2005-01-20T15:45:00.000+07:00

Top corner right: serit biru
Bottom corner right: white strain
Middle: serit merah
Bottom corner left: cagak (double tail)
Top corner left: serit hijau

Flood attack!

2005-01-20T15:02:00.000+07:00

As ussual, all-nite-long pouring rain resulting flood. Nothing's new. I woke up with a landscape view of brownish water. Everybody went panic. Me? I was too sleepy to be panic. Nothing holds off water, you know!. The flood stopped right on my teracce. It didn't go any further. We were lucky it was only flood, what if it was a tsunami...

A snapshot of flood.

Origin of me

2005-01-18T15:22:00.000+07:00

Saturday (01/15/05) noon til afternoon, a very long and exhausting first ever Hutaurk gathering. I have, in my blood, a small amount of Batakian (I have???). As the elderly said: "Shall we forget not our inheritance" here...here!
I finally get a slurp of Tea Addict. Lots choices of tea, comfy seat, neat music. My cousins performed FOC there.
Wanna see a devilish Geiska? Check it out!

Bakoel koffie

2005-01-12T15:42:00.000+07:00

Great koffie. Great place. Great atmosphere. Great reading. One disturbing mortal.

Bakoel Koffie at Senopati.

It's all about weekend!

2005-01-11T08:55:00.000+07:00

Life's highlight's for last weekend. Much sweat, energy, money burnt. Lessons learned. Not a bad one though. I had a fun with it.
#1
Wedding receptions! Two wedding receptions in remote areas in a weekend!
Do note this: the best venue to hold a wedding reception is the most strategic place and thus, easily accesible with any means by invitees.
#2
Spanning the city of Jakarta, back and forth, even more! I found this beautiful green and cozy earth place, where the grasses still high and all the machines virtually unheard. a perfect hideaway!
#3
Saturday nite shiver. Stop to find cheap dinner at Sabang. I shivered as my babe sincerely asked a begging street child to have a dinner together with us, while I was trying to reach a 1000 rupa. Her good deed sparked, all of a sudden. I know her good deed is much much bigger than mine but she never stops surprising me! And then there were us: me, my babe, Sami, Ira, and Yuni. enjoying seafood in the brim of Sabang's pavement, together. Yuni, the one who begged for money, asked her two cousins to be asked. A hungry mortal is a sick mortal. Apparently, Yuni's so-called mother was watching thru her eagle eyes in a distance. She had a problem seeing her daughter dine lusciously while she didn't. The starving Yuni suddenly freeze. She couldn't take her sight away from her mom. She was feared! Feared of being full while her mom didn't. I and my babe did not understand that situation at all. It's completely beyond our dimension and sane human thought. So, we asked waiter to pack the unfinished seafood and pack anew rice for Yuni (or her mom???!!!)
A mere first grade little girl forced to feed her beloved yet hated parents.

All cost me my healh, which produced a one sick leave taken.

Thank you, God. For this given rice.

Pusing

2005-01-07T09:04:00.000+07:00

Pusing! Gw kira da ilang pusingnya, tau-taunya muncul lagi. Jadi pengen cuti setengah hari neh.

Pusing, 593, laper = the morning biggest issues.

Halo...halo...halo...!!! Anyone out there???

Good old Toto

2005-01-06T09:10:00.000+07:00

audio: Africa (Toto)

Good gracious of God! I have mp3 version of Lea. It has been a long long while since I heard that song. Feels like tons of memories cross.

Thanks to Arinta Zerri for introducing me to Toto. Where are you Z-man? And my buddy, the jack of all trades, Temmy Adhi? You guys really broadened my small horizon and enhanced my quality of mind.

Toto places me into a sunset afternoon, where zephyr cuddles, clock stops, life forgotten, and only me and my precious thoughts of good things.

Another audio: Rossana (Toto)

Matrix Blackberry

2005-01-05T10:20:00.000+07:00

Nih produk keren banget! Bayangin aja voice data, fax data, SMS, e-mail, always connected internet access(!), koneksi ke LAN di satu gadget! Betul-betul office on the go. Cocok banget tuh buat para field tripper. Sayang baru paket korporasi aja yang ditawarkan. Kalo da ada paket individual user, gw ambil. Tapi pasti mahal ya...gadget-nya plus services fee-nya. Dasar negara terbelakang! Akses komunikasi+informasi aja dimahalin. Gimana orang pada mo maju???

Lihat Matrix Blackberry.

3 hal

2005-01-04T14:30:00.000+07:00

My molar is killing me! It turns out the other molar, the second from back of my upper jaw, not the regularly troubled molar. I need to see dr.Ade real soon! Toothache is no better than heartache.

Please be noted: I must and will have a personal website from this year ahead! Not that free and full-of-hassle hosting. I’m talking about the one that cost you some of your fortune. I should have a website to plunge myself to more practical world of web design etc. Every time I see a beautiful+gorgeous website, my mind tickled and asks why can I have my own website with my name or other personally-picked word(s) as my domain? I will!

Dead Betta Splendens. It’s a partial prove that genetically I don’t have the luxurious gift to have a pet, even it’s a small fish.

Something new

2005-01-04T11:04:00.000+07:00

Mengomentari terhadap pemberitaan media massa tentang korban bencana alam di Aceh dan sekitarnya, yang semakin hari semakin kurang elemen something new.

Keadaan mutakhir di Aceh pasca bencana bukanlah semata komoditi informasi. Keadaan tersebut sepatutnya menjadi hal yang perlu disarikan hikmahnya dan menggugah perilaku umat manusia. Perilaku busuk dan yang kian lama membusuk sehingga sulit untuk menjadi tidak busuk!

Elemen something new dalam informasi mengenai keadaan pasca bencana sudah bukanlah hal yang perlu diketahui. Keseluruhan bencana inilah yang perlu menjadi suatu risalah utama bagi manusia. Manusia patut memproyeksikan diri mereka sendiri ke dalam keadaan muram yang menimpa masyarakat Aceh dan sekitarnya agar mampu mensyukuri keadaan normal yang dinikmatinya sekarang.

Kita, manusia, sering salah mencari sesuatu di tempat yang salah.

*manusia: aku, kau, kamu, dia, anda, mereka, kita, kami, kalian.

Untuk Tuhan yang mengingatkan manusia, untuk manusia yang sering melupakan Tuhan.

Mungkin gak ya?

2005-01-04T10:30:00.000+07:00

Tiba-tiba terinspirasi oleh sebuah masukan rekan kerja senior. Kenapa tidak menjadikan core business LCJKT sebagai objek penelitian skripsi? Unit pengadaan informasi terekam dan tercetak wilayah Asia Tenggara! Yang terlintas seperti ini: metode pengadaan monograf multi-subjek yang diterbitkan secara resmi dan yang diterbitkan untuk konsumsi terbatas di Indonesia pada umumnya dan Jakarta pada khususnya pada acquisition unit di Library of Congress Regional Office, Jakarta.

Mungkin gak ya? Perlu diuji kepatutan dan kelayakanan objek penelitian dulu plus dianalisa metode n hambatan penelitian lapangannya neh. Semoga ini yang dicari...

New Year's Aftermath!

2005-01-03T11:33:00.000+07:00

Happy New Year 2005 *no trumpets or sounds!* + *flag flown at half-staff*
Lots of cash spent, card swipped, energy burnt, sins made. This is the new year's aftermath!
I was trying to make everybody happy and left my self virtually unhappy.
One of my countable points of happiness: kinky red pouch. The new home for my iPaq 1940! It cost merely 15K rups from a cheap and chic distro: Falshy. Do I look flashy or what?...

But still so much things to be thankful for...

Found!

2004-12-30T12:54:00.000+07:00

audio: brilliant sky (saybia)

The hypothetically lost wallet has been found! It turns out a misplaced occured.
Yesterday, I thought: it's merely a lost wallet filled with papers and plastics, not a life. A wallet filled with papers and plastics is merely a formal evidence of life. Without a life itself, it's nothing. I thank God for this soul still kept.

Too many souls gone, too many lifes vanquished. It is no more a gentle warning, it's a harsh slap from the All. And it is not over yet...

12/29/04

2004-12-29T19:20:00.000+07:00

Ya Allah...kami tersesat. Beri kami kesempatan untuk pulang.

Hypothetically lost?

2004-12-29T07:52:00.000+07:00

It is still a hypothesis that my wallet is missing! It feels that a life lost. All of my formal written proof of life are there. KTP, SIM, ATM, Medicare, KTMs, lomo filters, G-SHOCK warranty card, and some important papers. It's hypothetically a great lost!
A gentle whisper from God warns me that something is less. :(

Cupang buncit

2004-12-28T12:56:00.000+07:00

Sialan, cupang gw pada buncit! Gara-gara Salmonella sp. Baru maen, da ada masalah. Trus, susah banget ya cari Chocolate Strains. Nanya siapa ya...

It’s Tuesday! No big deal, just three days before 2005. New Year equals new problems.

Lomo on Dago Festival 2004: Printed!

2004-12-27T17:15:00.000+07:00

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxbegin of messagexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Contact print available.

Single pictures need to be selected before printed.

Still haven’t found decent image scanner.

The pictures look virtually nice. Some mood reluctance occurs.

In general, most are well! By far, it’s the best roll!

More adaptive measures needed. *too many passives applied*

Approximately, there are 26 frames of picture qualified for printing.

26 x 1000 rups = 26K rups. Printing will be postponed until 01/06/05.

More rolls needed to document people’s New Year frenzies.

Proplus in mind, thinking when film will be bought.

Have assumed charged.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxend of messagexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Last Monday in 2004

2004-12-27T16:30:00.000+07:00

The Mighty Furious God has spoken because this life has run to a wrong place.

No hiding place for we, mortals. There can be only prayers and a slight hope.

O hail sinners! Ye shall come to My immortal bath. Prepared...

16:19

2004-12-23T16:22:00.000+07:00

Satu menit lagi.
Tampilan blog masih bermasalah. Goddamn CSS!
Long weekend=max spending!

Bubye!

Betta splendens

2004-12-23T11:32:00.000+07:00

Tiba-tiba pengen punya ikan cupang neh. Tadinya ada ide bikin siluet ikan cupang buat logo.

Pas googling gambar trus jadi napsu pengen punya Chocolate Strains. Dulu taunya cupang belgi *o’on* asik banget geto lowh! Di internet banyak informasi pemeliharaanya pula. Sekarang tinggal cari tempat buat beli Betta Splendens a.k.a. Siamese Fighting fish.

Btw, Betta Splendens = cupang.

*slurp...*

Coffee tale

2004-12-23T10:55:00.000+07:00

A very hot French vanilla coffee.
A solid metal mug.
A smilling face with a mournful heart.
Am I alive?

Jawaban untuk sebuah pertanyaan pada sore 12/21/04.

2004-12-22T14:02:00.000+07:00

Indah itu...

Seorang kekasih yang bersahabat.

Yang mampu secara bersamaan mencintai dan menemani hidup sepi.

Seorang anak perempuan yg berpikir dia kuat, padahal dia sama seperti manusia2 lainnya: lemah.

Bengkok yang perlu diluruskan dan bengkok yang dibutuhkan untuk meluruskan.

Seorang sahabat yang melebihi kekasih atau seorang kekasih yang melebihi sahabat?

Cintaku, dosaku, bagian hidupku.

Ketidakseimbangan

2004-12-22T11:43:00.000+07:00

audio: save me (Aimee Mann)
Ketidakseimbangan ada dimana-mana. Mungkin memang harus seperti ini. Sesuatu yang tidak perlu dipertanyakan. Sesuatu yang harus terjadi. Mungkin ketidakseimbangan yang membuat dunia ini tidak sempurna. Mengapa aku bertanya? Lupakanlah!

Is it work?

2004-12-21T23:50:00.000+07:00

Hello there!
I’m posting my blog from e-mail!
Berhasil gak ya...???

Duck and Cover!

2004-12-21T11:54:00.000+07:00

audio: Seperti (After)

Hahaha! Duck and Cover drill. Seru!
Dasar bangsa paranoid (walau mereka sangat punya alasan buat parno)!
1154 saatnya maxi. Belum laper. All those market snacks (baca: jajanan pasar) stuff my stomach.
Belom beres2 ni posting Dago Festivalnya, paragraf2 terbayang di otak tapi tangan males mengetik.
I need a fully loaded 92F Baretta to blow my f***ing head off!
Sampai kapan semua ini selesai ya...
it's true what they said: life is not a damn thing, it's a damn thing one after another.

Bersyukur!

2004-12-20T11:36:00.000+07:00

Terkadang kita lupa untuk menerapkannya.
Dunia konsumtif ini selalu menghibur keinginan-keinginan kita, sampai rasa SYUKUR terlupakan.
KEINGINAN=~
Seperti kritik diskusif yang gw nasehatin ke cw gw, keinginan ga ada habisnya, rasa syukur sering "habis" di tengah jalan.
Kayanya semua hal itu cenderung jadi kritik dan otokritik diskusif buat orang yg gw sayang dan diri sendiri.
SYUKUR: hidup ini, nafas ini, rejeki ini, keadaan ini.
SIALAN: keinginan, nafsu, dunia kapitalis!

Keep looking for the Savior and the Path!

Technical problems

2004-12-20T11:26:00.000+07:00

Some technical problems occured.
#1
I still can not upload my pictures, another software needed. The software will cost me 3.6MB to add total of my monthly consumtive internet consumtion. It will soar me up to be numero une user. They will get something to throw me up!
*lasagna! There will be lasagna(s) for lunch!!! Slurp!*
#2
Some HTMLs need to be modified to get costumized look and feel. Coding...here I come! *Yakkksss!*

Manic monday!

2004-12-20T07:59:00.000+07:00

Cape euy! Baru pulang dari Bandung's Sinner pilgrimage kemaren jam 2130 make Harum nan bau!
Two themes of the day: Flat broke and Phatetic!
Gajian masih tiga hari lagi...duit sisa bwat dua hari lagi *rintik air mata mulai turun*
Mo pinjem koperasi buat nu year++, gagal! Terpaxa gesek neh buat taon baru...dzig!
Satu hal bagus hari ini...free lunch from the Director. Hemat goceng.
Another story coming rite up!

Satu...dua...tiga...mulai!

2004-12-17T16:23:00.000+07:00

Another blog created!
Smoga dapet berjalan terus. Biasanya seh buat trus ditinggalin...
kalo ngga, lupa username and password. *stupid me #@!^$!#(0!!!*
Oh iya, sebagai edisi awal, gw mo pajang foto my lovely fake adi dassler :) Shot using P800 under perfect lighting of Mango Plaza Indonesia.